Conversation

I fluffed my hair a bit after coming home from the salon to get the crunchy feeling out of it (mousse & curl revitalizer) so it looks a bit different than in the photo. And we've had a few more hours to get used to it. I asked Andy what he thinks.

Me: So what do you think of my hair? Do I look younger? Older? Sportier? Frumpier?

Andy: Hmmm...

Me: What? Tell me what you think.

Andy: I'm trying to come up with a way to say it nicely.

Me: If it's not nice, don't make it sound nice. Tell me what you're thinking.

Andy: It's a good thing by society's standards.

Me: But I won't think so?

Andy: Well, I don't think it's good.

Me: Ok, so tell me what it is. You already know I'm not crazy about how it looks.

Andy: It looks - sophisticated... glamorous.

Me: Can I write that in my blog?

Another Locks of Love donation

When pulled straight, it was about 1.5 inches longer.

You have to wonder who is looking forward to getting a hairpiece made with that mess?

It's longer than I anticipated but we'll see how it goes. This is one of about 10 photos I took of myself when I got home from the salon and they all look weird.

Questionnaire

I told Betsy that I read her blog regularly so now I should answer the questions she recently answered which made me point out that I read her blog regularly.

5 things I plan to do before I die:



1. Re-visit Alaska

2. Learn Spanish relatively well

3. Have more kids

4. Accept God's grace passionately

5. Ride my bike a few thousand more miles

5 things I can do:



1. Design an efficiently normalized relational database model

2. Type fast

3. Laugh at my own jokes

4. Throw a disc (frisbee) multiple ways

5. Stick my tongue out far enough to touch my nose

5 things I cannot do:



1. Art

2. Sing well

3. Juggle

4. Run fast

5. Take criticism well

5 things that attract me to the opposite sex:



1. Kindness

2. Mouth/teeth/smile

3. Humility

4. Voice

5. Muscles

5 things I say most often:



1. That's cool.

2. mmmMMM... (a la Marge Simpson)

3. But if you don't want to, that's ok.

4. I need to check email.

5. How about YOU do that?

3 celebrity crushes (I couldn't think of 5):



1. Matthew McConaughey

2. Brad Pitt in Ocean's Twelve

3. Will Smith

5 people I want to do this next:



Anybody - I love reading this kind of thing

Prayer

Credited to St. Ignatius of Loyola, as used in Sunday service yesterday. It really strikes me, especially the bold line.

Jesus, may all that is you flow into me.

May your body and blood be my food and drink.

May your passion and death be my strength and life.

Jesus, with you by my side, enough has been given.

May the shelter I seek be the shadow of your cross

Let me not run from the love which you offer.

But hold me safe from the forces of the enemy.

On each of my dyings shed your light and your love.

Keep calling to me until that day comes

When, with your saints, I may praise you forever.

Amen.

That's illegal in most states

I have a stuffed animal squirrel that Andy used as a prop during his wonderful, surprising and really cool marriage proposal to me. It sits on my dresser and sometimes Kevin asks to play with it. This is how it went today.

Kevin: This your squirrel?

Me: Yes, Papa gave it to me when he asked me to marry him.

Kevin: Marry the squirrel?

Stuck in my head

I see a fire truck

A big red shiny fire truck

I see a fire truck

Coming down the street.

And... there's... a...

Noisy siren wailing on that truck!

I see a fire truck

A big red shiny fire truck

I see a fire truck

Coming down the street.

And... there... are...

Firefighters riding on that truck!

And there are firefighters riding

And a noisy siren wailing on that truck!

I see a fire truck

A big red shiny fire truck

I see a fire truck

Coming down the street.

And... there... are...

Great big fire hoses on that truck!

And there's a great big fire hose

And firefighters riding

And a noisy siren wailing on that truck!

I see a fire truck

A big red shiny fire truck

I see a fire truck

Coming down the street.

And... there's... a...

Big ol' snaky ladder on that truck!

And there's a big ol' snaky ladder

And a great big fire hose

And firefighters riding

And a noisy siren wailing on that truck!

I'm a short, overweight and timid woman - hear me roar

I drove to the playground this afternoon and was the only parent actually on the playground. The others were playing tennis and such. So when I heard the teenage boys ram their motorized scooter into the port-a-john around the corner, I knew it was up to me to nip the hooligans in the butt - er, bud. It's unlike me to stick my nose into something that doesn't actually wrap itself around my nose so this is why I have to write about it.

I decided that I'd just let my presence be known. The kids were fooling around on the other side of the trees and probably had no idea that so many people were in the park. So I held my chin up high (up to about their chests) and walked confidently (I'm a good actress) around the bend and directly toward them. Kevin followed and asked what I was doing so I said rather loudly, "I'm just seeing who is making all this noise over here and checking out their cars." I committed their makes and models to memory plus the beginning of their license plate #'s just so I would have fire power should they choose to confront me. Of course if they did, I wouldn't have stuck around long enough to show them that I'd remember them. But anyway, they pretty quickly hopped in their cars and took off, leaving their poor friend on the scooter by himself. When he realized they were leaving, he picked up the scooter and ran to catch up, losing his fashionable drawers down by his knees. It was funny watching this guy try to hold onto the scooter and his pants and run up the park road to catch up with his rapidly retreating friends.

When he was passing us Kevin asked me what he was doing. I enjoyed the moment to teach them both that, "When people do bad things, the first reaction is usually to run. That's also when you find out how true your friends really are."

One of the cars waited for the scooter guy at the top of the hill and I kept walking toward them until they took off and I couldn't see them anymore. Then I turned around to return to the playground and while feeling seriously proud and empowered, I started to shake and got light-headed.

First soccer class

I just checked out the website for the soccer program (U.K. Elite) that Kevin started yesterday and I'm a bit overwhelmed. But anyway, his first class went well. I want to write about it before I forget.

We decided to forego buying him cleats (he's 3!) but we bought the required shinguards and then found out from the coaches that they aren't necessary. Oh well, no harm in being safer and like the coaches said, it will help the kids get more used to them the longer they wear them. Coach Josh and Coach Dave both hail from the U.K. and talk funny like our friends the Greens, who just (sadly) returned to the U.K. after living here for over a year.

I had to walk Kevin over to the group to sit down but then he was ok staying there by himself. He was a step behind for awhile as he figured out what the coaches were saying to do and seeing what the other kids were doing but he hung in there. At one point he started kicking his ball and running directly to me but he was intercepted by a coach and didn't mind being guided back to the field.

Twenty-five minutes into the hour, he ran over to me and said, "I'm done. I want to go home." I asked if he wanted to go listen but not play and he again said, "No, I'm done. I want to go home. Let's go home." I told him we would sit there and watch and wait for Andy to come before leaving. He sat with me for a little under 10 minutes and after drinking a huge amount of water, I suggested he might want to go listen to the coaches even if he didn't want to play. He agreed and grabbed a ball and headed back to the group and stayed the rest of the time. When Andy arrived, Kevin ditched the ball and the field and ran over for a hug but then went back to playing pretty quickly.

He needs to learn to stop picking up the ball but otherwise, he did pretty well. I don't think he understands the coaches' instructions but he'll get there. They played some fun games and the coaches were good.

When it was time to leave, Kevin cried, "I want to stay here. Can I stay here, pleeeeease?" Then he said that the whole ride home. "Mama, pleeeeeease. I want to stay there. Pleeeeease!" That was a bit tiring but I was really glad that he'd had a good time. Now he's excited to practice with his soccer ball at home and wear his shinguards again.

I should be packing

I'm moving back and forth from the couch to my computer desk today. Nap on the couch, read email, nap on the couch, read email. I should be washing dishes or packing for camping but I really have no energy to do so. I noticed this morning while lying on the couch that my throat felt like it was closed in. I attempted to relieve the feeling by changing positions but it didn't get any better. This feeling continues.

The only other time in my life I had such a painful sore throat and a feeling that it was closed in was when I had mono. Of course when I realized this a few minutes ago, I raced (well, walked slowly but with determination) to the computer to look up whether I can get it again. Probably not, which is what I remembered reading/hearing previously. That's good, although all of the documents I read left a little window of opportunity open for a strange body to have multiple active infections in their lifetime.

Did I ever mention that my shingles was misdiagnosed by a couple of doctors? Ok, I know I did. But did I ever mention that my case of mono was also misdiagnosed by a couple of doctors? And in a university health care center setting? Sheesh. Anyway, I had a raging case of mono with the whole liver involvement thing and I had to leave school for a few weeks and drop some classes for that semester. Seems like I don't get sick very often but when I get sick, I get sick!

So I doubt I have mono but even if I do, it's not like there's anything to do about it but rest and drink lots of fluids and try to tame the symptoms, so I should just go camping this weekend with Andy and Kevin, right? I just need to let them do all the packing and setting up of camp :-)

Real self pity - not just a post *about* it

I feel like I was run over by a truck. I haven't had a fever like this in a long time and it's knocking me flat. The knives in my throat I can handle - the all over prickly, painful, stiff, sore, sweaty chilly feeling has got to go.

No work for me today and, thankfully, no Kevin for me today. He's at Magy's house. Maybe I'll get some rest and he'll have fun without cranky Mama for a day.

Self pity

I don't know whether this is normal for other people or not, but this is how being sick works for me. I might feel a little sick or a lot sick, but I'll keep going like I'm not sick until somebody officially tells me that I'm sick. Then I'm miserable.

To this day I'm still bitter about the lost self-indulgence and pity that I could've had when I had shingles a couple of years ago. Granted, I was miserable even while some doctors were telling me I had a sinus infection, but because it was "just a sinus infection," I kept going to work and doing all of my usual things. Then I found out I had shingles and I thought 1) I knew there was an explanation for my excruciating pain and I wasn't just being a wuss and 2) well NOW I can feel sorry for myself and tell other people about how bad I feel. As if I couldn't tell people had bad it really was when it was "just a sinus infection."

The same thing is happening this week. I've been sick since the end of last week with it getting progressively worse this week. My throat has been sore all day, every day - every time I swallow, it's like I'm swallowing a knife. My skin is prickly and sore all over and I'm tired and cranky. My glands have bulged such that my neck is always painful. However, I still went to work, I still took care of Kevin, I still planned packing for the camping trip and grocery shopping, etc. Then I went to the doctor today and was diagnosed with a throat infection of some sort, was told I do have a fever, was told to take both Tylenol and Advil at the same time for the pain, was told to get lots of rest, was told I'd be called if my throat culture shows up some weird strain of something, and was told not to get near to Kevin and by no means should I kiss him.

And now, I'm a sniveling, whimpering shlump of a person. Because now it's official that I'm sick and I can prove it to everybody because the doctor told me so.

Hopefully just strep

Can someone recommend a good thermometer to use at home for testing my family members' temperatures? The ones I have never seem to work. They tend to be accurate (they give the same reading under the same conditions) but they're far from precise (giving a true reading.) [Mr. Heitz, if you're out there... see, I DID listen well in high school chemistry class!]

I've been sick this week although pretending I'm not. I'm swallowing knives and the glands in my neck are now big enough that I can see them bulging out in the mirror. Ick. I've also had prickly, painful skin. That usually means a fever but, doggone it, I've checked my temperature multiple times and it never registered higher than 98.9. So, no fever. I am taking Tylenol for my sore throat but I've even taken my temperature after letting the Tylenol run out.

The knives and prickly skin and bulging glands got to be too much this morning so I went to the doctor. After taking Tylenol, my temperature was 100. I wouldn't have thought that's a big deal but the Dr. said that on Tylenol, that is defintely a fever. She swabbed my throat for a culture and put me on antibiotic. We'll find out Monday whether there's anything out of the ordinary growing in there. I surely hope not.

When I was a kid, the doctor said, "Let's do a throat culture just to see what's going on." I freaked out. Seriously freaked out. I remembered a throat culture as something different (a brown q-tip with bad-tasting stuff on it) and was quite against having that done again. When the Dr. put the long swab in and just brushed around, I was like, "Hey, that wasn't bad at all!" Then we got home and my mom and I walked down the driveway to tell my dad about the appointment and I suddenly saw the world spinning before my eyes and felt like I was moving even though I wasn't. I woke up laying on the driveway feeling really groggy and then I threw up. Fun! My mom called the doctor and he said that he was surprised that I hadn't fainted in his office as worked up as I was about the throat culture. Nothing to worry about, just nerves.

I told the Dr. today that I once fainted from getting a throat culture and she backed away and said, "Well, you just let me know when you're ready. I'll wait."

This is why I'm not a dentist

Kevin's tooth is not missing or broken, it's just now erupting out of his gum. How we thought he had 20 teeth before and now only 19, I don't know. He has an area of decay on his front tooth that needs to be drilled but the dentist wants to wait until he's a little older to do that. He said it'll keep growing even though we brush his teeth every day. He also said there aren't any other pitted spots to be concerned about, which is good.

Kevin is now the proud owner of a blinking toothbrush. You push on the handle and the light blinks for a minute, at which point you know you've brushed long enough.

What's up

• Kevin's Parks & Rec class, "Twist, Jump & Shout," was cancelled so he is now registered for U.K. Elite Petite Soccer for an hour on Thursdays. We had to buy him shin guards - I never knew they made 5-inch long shin guards. They're labeled "Size: Peewee."



• Last Thursday Andy finally went to the climbing gym with no injury to stop him only to find a "Closed for the evening" sign on the door.



• Last night while brushing Kevin's teeth he cried more than usual and his toothbrush came out pink. We discovered that he now has 19 teeth instead of 20. He has an appointment with the dentist tomorrow.



• Tomorrow we have an appointment with our social worker for our 12-month post-placement report interview. Yup, we'll celebrate our 1-yr anniversary as a family in 2 weeks. Hard to believe!



• This weekend we're planning to go camping. We spent one night in our tent on our church property but this will be our first family-only camping trip to a park.



• I have an appointment to get my hair cut (and donate it) on Wednesday, Sept 28th. Instead of a buzz-cut like last time, I think I'll go for a round, "frumpy mom" cut.

Dear Drivers

As a cyclist I promise...

• to do my best to signal my intentions regarding slowing down or changing course


• to stay on the shoulder where the shoulder permits me to safely ride


• to stay on the roadway where the shoulder does not permit me to safely ride


• to make my presence known to you, even if that means being in your way on purpose


• to expect that you will be annoyed by my presence and do stupid things because of your annoyance


• to continue riding despite your annoyance because I know that while on my bike I am a) not adding greenhouse gases to the atmosphere, b) decreasing your health insurance premiums as I become healthier and cut down on the number of claims I make, and c) decreasing the demand for gasoline thereby increasing the supply (and reducing the price) for you

Bedtime funnies

I've always found the bedtime routine thing to be annoying. At least now there are moments of humor.

• Tonight when I went back in his room he asked for a drink and after that he said, "Sing, Mama. 'See my vest, see my vest, ...real gorilla chest.'" He wanted me to sing Mr. Burns's rendition of See My Vest (to the tune of "Be my guest" from "Beauty & the Beast") from The Simpsons.


• Last week I went back into Kevin's room when he called out and I fluffed his pillow, tucked him in tighter and sang to him. In the middle of my soothing lullaby he said, "Where's Papa? Can you go get Papa?"

Picture Parade

This is for Elesa. The giraffes were out and active at the zoo last Friday.

Update:This turtle (Clemmys muhlenbergii) is not a herbivore - it is an opportunistic feeder but prefers invertebrates such as slugs, worms, and insects. Although Kevin's fingers are not sluggy, wormy or insecty, I still think he'd lose one if this were real and true to size.

"Look, Mama - Papa is a ladybug!" (yes, he really said that)

At the beach

Great Questions

Our church is doing a series on peoples' stories in an effort to learn more about God through the experiences of other people just like we learn from the stories of peoples' encounters with God in the Bible. The stories this week were Stories of Struggle and one of the discussion questions that came out of it is "What did someone else do for you that was an expression of God's love to you during your own struggle?"

One of my friends consistently shows me expressions of God's love by asking me questions that show she understands what's lying beneath the surface of the issue/struggle we're discussing. This means two things to me: 1) she (and God) help me realize things I hadn't thought about before and 2) she (and God) show me that I'm not the only one who cares or "gets" what's really going on.

Here's an example: You all know (if you've read my blog before) that I went through a really dark time when we first adopted Kevin. During a visit to my friend's house a couple of months after Kevin came home, I told her that it was difficult but I didn't go into too many details. I told her it was hard, I didn't think I enjoyed being a parent, etc. She asked me, "Do you love him?" I was stunned that she'd even ask that because why would someone think to ask, "Do you love your child?" Truth be told, I didn't feel that I loved him but it's not something I felt open to say. When she asked that, I knew that at least God (and probably my friend :-) knew how I was feeling and that I had a lot of stuff going on inside that I couldn't/shouldn't share.

I've talked to this friend about many issues since I've known her and I always leave our conversations feeling loved, understood and more clear-minded about things. She shows me through her questions how God loves and understands me deep inside.

I must brag about my volleyball team

This being our second season in this league at The Volleyball House, we were hoping for a better than .500 record (which would've been much better than our previous/first season.) We definitely did better than .500 and we even got ourselves into the playoffs as the 4th seed. We played the team seeded first and we won in 2 games. Yes, they were without one of their regular female players and yes, the substitute was a bit inexperienced, but they also had an A level male player who is not usually on their team. So, that technically balanced out in my opinion and our 2-game win was really cool. We had to wait around for the #2 vs. #3 match and then we took to the court against the winner. Some on our team are in great shape and some of us are not - those of us who aren't really petered out in the last match from fatigue and muscle stiffness (that sets on quicker the older you get, I hear.) Anyway, we won the first game but then lost the last 2. We were disappointed but proud that we got much farther this season than we expected. And we got a compliment from the ref when she said she thought we were in a league higher than we are. That was before our second match, but that's ok, it's not like it wasn't us out there during the first match, it was just a "fresher" us.

Andy's back (you can take that 2 ways and either way fits!)

So last week was a little crazy. At 4:30 am on Tuesday morning, Andy rolled over in bed and wrenched a muscle in his back. The pain was excruciating so I took him to the doctor that morning. He didn't go to work for 3 days and could barely move. Even when he wasn't moving, he was in pain. I wasn't able to get all of my work hours in and I was responsible for more than usual as Andy couldn't do anything around the house or with Kevin. I honestly don't know how single mothers do it and I start to have a panic attack when I consider what would happen if Andy wasn't around and it was just me left with Kevin or, in the future, even more kids. I do know that I have a large and deep net of support from friends and family and that I would do ok but I don't really want to find out for sure how well I'd cope.

Andy is feeling much better now. He can do most everything although his back does bother him sometimes still. At least he can drive and play with Kevin - woohoo!

In other much more vain and less important news, I almost called today to make an appointment to donate my hair. I was planning to go a few extra months to donate more, but I'm about at the end of my rope and I know this feeling - usually it ends in a very last-minute trip to the hair cutter but this time I have to wait a month for each month I miss because the salon that I want to go to (the one I went to last time) only does free LOL cuts on the last Wednesday of the month. So... if I don't go the day after tomorrow, I have to wait another month. That is likely what will happen and maybe by the end of September I'll change my mind, but I doubt it - especially since I have a trip to Cape May, NJ, planned in October. Traveling with this rat's nest, especially by the ocean where it's humid even in the fall, is quite a pain. Not that anybody cared to hear all that but, oh well, there it is.

I'm such a sucker

Last night we watched Hitch on DVD. I realized quickly that I'd seen the movie before, although it previously starred Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson and it was called How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days. The lead characters get together in a wildly cute manner and decide that despite themselves, they like each other. Then their jobs blow them apart and in the end, they realize that they were wrong about each other and they need to be together. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind that Hitch was technically a remake. What I do mind is that both of those movies make me giggle like a school-girl and it annoys me that they sucker me in. "Romantic comedy" is not what I'm about; I'm not supposed to be about love stories, 'k?

Teamwork

I've always preferred single-player sports to team sports mostly because when I do poorly, I don't bring down a whole team. I don't like being responsible for whether other people win or lose. I'm learning in my wise old age, though, that there is no comparison to the feeling of a team coming together in victory.

My volleyball team won all 3 games tonight for the first time since we moved into our current league (which is way more competetive than our previous league.) While some people have improved their individual skills, that wasn't the deciding factor in our commanding play tonight. The real difference was that we played as a TEAM. We weren't 6 people on the court trying to hit the ball to one another, it was like we were one entity. We covered the court better than ever, patching holes that our opponents tried to pry open, and we communicated clearly. I don't think we had a single unforced error of the ball dropping when somebody should've had it.

Our teamwork didn't come together by running drills or practicing our passing, setting, serving, and hitting - our teamwork came together from playing together, period. There's no way to quantify how we improved working together and you'd be hard-pressed to find noticeable differences in our teamwork from match to match. If you look at our play 2 months ago and compare it to tonight, though, you'd see a group of people playing volleyball turning into a team of players coordinating a win. And what a sweet win it was.

Wholesome Family Fun

Here are cousins Julia (4 1/2) and Kevin (3) with Grandma and Grandpa enjoying (some of) Grandpa's stash of super soakers.

It's a sand thing, you wouldn't understand

We've been at the beach (Ocean City, MD, area) since Wednesday. We were fortunate enough to go with a friend whose family has a house down there and we had a terrific time. We relaxed more over the past 4 days than we have in a year as Kevin was occupied with/by Daniel and Noel for most of the time. He had tons of fun with them.

We went to the beach (Assateague) on Thursday and although I absolutely love to swim in the ocean, I'd forfeit that from now on if it meant never getting another grain of sand in everything we own. I've never been big into the beach as I much prefer being in the woods in the mountains, but now that I have a child who doesn't swim, who won't go barefoot or even wear sandals without socks and who doesn't remember not to touch his mouth or eyes when his hands are sandy, I see that I'm even less of a beach person. But it was fun to go and maybe Kevin will someday not be so afraid of water that he'll have fun with the ocean.

Friday afternoon we went to the boardwalk between the raindrops and mostly ate and walked although we did stop in The Kite Loft, which was pretty cool. Kevin's greatest desire in that store was a lollipop. When told that he could choose either the lollipop or ice cream later he said, "Lollipop!" I clarified a few times asking, "Do you understand that when the rest of us stop for ice cream you can't have any?" and he replied, "No ice cream! Lollipop!" Ok, that was easy enough. Half of the lollipop still exists in all its sticky, watermelony glory on our kitchen counter.

Kirsten and I spent a lot of time at the kitchen table putting jigsaw puzzles together. Yesterday we finished the really tough one she had started before we got there so we put out another one in the afternoon and finished it before bed. Woohoo!

We drove home today and the second thing that I did after unloading the van was to wash off the sandy toys. Some of them went right back into the sandbox but the ones that didn't start out there got a good dunking and they won't be let back into the house until they receive a certificate of lack-o-sand from moi.

It was nice to come back today rather than tomorrow because 1) the traffic was way better than it will be tomorrow and 2) we still have tomorrow to spend together before the work week begins.

Thanks Kirsten, Daniel & Noel - we had a tremendous time!

Solo weekend

I'm so happy that you want to know how my weekend went! Thanks for caring.

It went very well and that was only partially my fault. On Saturday we went to my parents' house and they were watching my niece for the weekend so she and Kevin played together a lot of the time. We went to a pool and, of course, Kevin didn't swim but he hung in there with us well enough. I hoped that having other people coax him into getting in the water would help but it didn't.

He fell asleep in the car on the way home that night so I didn't have to deal with bedtime, which was a relief. I find the whole bedtime routine and his sometimes flaky sleep difficult to deal with.

I did something very smart this weekend. Before it got really dark out and before I got the willies about being in the house "alone" I turned on the light by my bed and I closed the drapes in my bedroom and the bathroom. That way when it was time to go to bed, I didn't have a panic attack that somebody was looking in the window or following me down the dark hallway. It worked amazingly well and I have no idea why I never thought of doing that before.

Sunday morning we got up and went to church, played at the playground and then came home for lunch. I was tired but not in a bad mood, per se. Andy arrived around 1:00 pm and wasn't really ready for the barrage of questions and stories that I was trying to throw at him so I tried to back off until he was ready. He showered (that made us all feel better) and then I took Kevin with me to the grocery store and when we got back, Andy was ready to deal with us again.

Kevin wasn't head over heels excited to see Andy, which surprised me. However, we've since realized that he can only like one of us at a time. Whichever one he currently fancies, he completely un-fancies the other. So, he'd been with me all weekend and was comfortable with that but after he and Andy played awhile and I took a nap, then it was all about Papa and I was shunned.

Tomorrow we're headed to the beach for our first "vacation" together. Should be a good time trying to convince Kevin to wear a life vest, get in the canoe, walk near the ocean and stay out of Daniel's and Noel's faces at least a few hours a day. Seriously, I'm looking forward to it (well, maybe not the car ride). I think we'll have a good time.

Don't hug me, yes hug me, don't hug me, yes hug me

When Andy got home from work today he had time to finish packing and eat dinner before heading out. While he was packing, Kevin wanted him to play so we tried to keep his mind off the fact that Papa didn't have time to play by showing him the things packed in Papa's bag. Paul arrived and we put Andy's things in his car and I suggested to Kevin that he give Papa a hug and a kiss and he said, "No" and backed away. What was that?? So I fake him into giving Andy a hug and then we say Bye and Kevin and I stand on the front porch waving as they drive up the road.

We get back into the house and Kevin starts to cry. Then he says, "I want to play with Papa" with tears running down his cheeks. I reply, "That's sweet, I bet Papa wants to play with you, too. You will be able to play with him when he comes home on Sunday after we come home from church." Still crying, Kevin says, "I want to play with Papa NOW." Visions of an entire 36 hours of this sadness and crying flash through my mind but before my inner freak-out becomes public Kevin says (while still crying), "I want to watch TV."

He was so allowed to watch TV.

Life is a learning experience

As previously mentioned, I didn't bring lunch today because I thought there was a contract party (ahem.) So, I jetted over to McDonalds and here are some things I learned on my trip.

• Traffic is easier to get through when you make all right-hand turns


• Not having air conditioning is a good thing at the drive-thru because you don't waste any cold air while sitting there with your window open


• Mattel now makes light-up matchbox cars


• The Chipotle next to McDonalds has seriously put a crimp in McDonalds business
  
• Cutting across traffic in an accidentally dangerous manner is best done not in front of a police car

Go Away, Husband

Andy is going camping this weekend with a friend who promises not to talk except when necessary or Andy wants to be talked to (now THAT is a great friend, no?) I can't fully describe how excited Andy is about the trip and I am honestly excited for him.

The farther I get away from despising my role as a parent the more I realize what bad shape I was in back then. This weekend shows me a glimpse of how far I have come because I'm not dreading it. Yes, I have plans out of the house already so that Kevin and I don't get sick of each other but I don't think that negates anything. Even if I didn't have plans out of the house or with other people, I know that I'd survive and wouldn't crumble. That's saying a lot based on how I felt previously.

When Kevin had been with us for about 5 months, I went away for a scrapbooking weekend with some friends. I didn't want to come home. It wasn't that the scrapbooking was so great (I didn't get much done and didn't really like the pages I made) and it wasn't that I wouldn't see all of those friends regularly once we got home... it was just that I didn't want to return to my house and family. My shoulders sagged and my head drooped at the thought of coming home.

In October, I'm going away for another scrapbooking weekend and I expect it will be very different. I expect I'll enjoy being away from the family but that I'll be ok with going back even if I'm not itching to return. And I think that's normal, unlike what I felt before and continue to glide away from as I get more and more used to this thing called parenting.

Enjoy your weekend, Andy. I will enjoy mine.

How To Embarass Your Officemate

Tell him yesterday that the Contract Party scheduled for August 25th is TODAY so that

• he doesn't bring his lunch


• when he is in the elevator with his project manager he excitedly says, "So, big contract party today, eh? How do we get there, by bus?" To which his project manager can only reply, "Uh, I don't think that's today... And it'll be in our conference room."

Oops.

Email exchange

This morning at work, one of our database servers crashed hard twice. My brother is the system administrator in charge of such things and somebody asked him if he had any idea what was killing the server. His response:

No but Dianne says "she is working on the system" which almost certainly has something to do with this.

Hmmph!

What's up

I'm working in the office 3 days this week to make up for last week's lack of hours at home and my predicted lack of hours from home this week.

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I began writing our petition to "re-adopt" Kevin in Maryland. While the US government sees our adoption of Kevin in Guatemala as complete, Maryland does not. We have to file the same petition as someone who is adopting a child domestically. It's another bunch of paperwork and some of the instructions are very confusing but I think it'll be ok. We'll have to go to court after we file the petition but that shouldn't be a big deal. This will allow us to get his Certificate of Citizenship as well as a Maryland birth certificate (much easier to use for entering school, sports programs, etc. Plus if he decides to adopt children, he won't have to jump through extra hoops (hoops, yes - extra hoops, no) to get appropriate paperwork.)

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I'm wearing a shirt that says "Summer" on it while covered in a chamois-cloth shirt because it is 68 degrees and windy in my office. [Please, don't write and tell me how your office is so hot and you'd love to have it be 68 degrees and windy where you are - I'm not complaining, I just find my attire ironic.] And I'm drinking hot chocolate. In August.

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Andy's sister and her family came to visit this weekend from Missouri. Poor Andrew was sick the whole time - we mostly only saw him between naps while taking medicine for his fever. Kevin warmed up well and had fun playing with his new-to-him family members.

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Kevin slept-in the past *4* days - twice past 8:00! I've considered banking on him waking up late but as soon as I get up early to get some work done while he sleeps, I know that he'll get up with me and I'll be nothing but annoyed. We measured him last night in preparation for him to grow an inch in the next month. Why else would he be sleeping more? We can't think of anything that has changed.

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A couple of my coworkers went to Big Nerd Ranch two weeks ago and when they returned, we all gathered around them to hear the details. Did you learn much? Was the food good? Were you the only two non-nerds there? [Oh hush, Andy - I and everyone I work with are NOT nerds.]

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Andy works for the US Gov't Printing Office at a warehouse in Laurel. It's been officially announced that the warehouse will close. They expect to close it by next summer and while they will offer any employees who don't take the retirement buyout (Andy's old, but not old enough that a retirement buyout would work for him) a position in the downtown DC headquarters, Andy does not plan to work in DC. We're both of the "whatever" mindset at the moment, I suppose for various reasons: 1) he could always work in DC for awhile even though the extended commute would put pressure on both of us, 2) he's got a fair amount of time to look for another job, 3) I could work full-time with benefits to get us through short- or long-term while he could stay home with Kevin, and 4) God will show us the right thing to do and when to do it.

Conversation

Conversations are great blog posts because they write themselves and I always find them funny (why else would I post them?)

Scene: The dinner table

Dianne (to Kevin): Tell Papa what you did at the playground today.

Kevin (facing straight ahead): I can't hear you talking, I'm trying to eat. (looks at plate and resumes eating)

Papa (to Kevin): Are you already learning selective listening?

Kevin (looking up from food at Andy): Huh?

Papa (to Dianne): You're going to blog about this aren't you?

Overheard at our house last night

"You're STILL reading Tour articles?!"

Call me hardcore

We haven't played ultimate in a long time because of the high heat and humidity over the past few weeks. Even when the high temp is in the upper-80's, we err on the side of caution and don't subject ourselves to running around in the sun for an hour at high noon, so it's actually been 6-8 weeks since we played.

You can imagine my glee upon hearing today's weather forecast - high of 80-85. Whoopee! I packed my bag for ultimate last night so that I would be sure not to forget it this morning.

Tuesday, yesterday and today Andy has been in a training class in DC so he's driven the truck to the train station and taken the train into the city. Because I'm dropping Kevin off and picking him up, I've secured the van for the past few days even though I've been driving to work.

So on the way to drop Kevin off this morning, I realized that I didn't have my cleats for ultimate - the horror! The only shoes with me were my new shoes that I didn't want to get wet and grass-stained. The thought came to mind that I could drive to the train station and get my cleats out of the truck. That would be a bit desperate, though, wouldn't it?

Maybe I am desperate or maybe I'm hardcore, but I knew I was going to play today and I knew I'd be annoyed if I messed up my new shoes so I did it - I drove to the train station, wound around the parking lot looking for my truck and then hopped out, stole the shoes, and headed to the office. If I hadn't gotten stuck in traffic, my detour would've only cost me about 7-8 extra minutes. The ramp to get back onto I-95 after my detour, though, was stopped pretty far back so I added at least 15 minutes to my trip. You can't argue that it wasn't worth it though, right? Yeah, ask me at 1:30 this afternoon if it was worth and I guarantee I'll answer, "Duuuuude! I played me some ultimate!"

Conversation

Dianne: [The Senior Pastor Candidate] talked in his sermon about some things they did in the other U.S. church that he was a pastor with. They did a lot of "small-scale" service projects like raking peoples' leaves in the fall, giving out coats at football games, washing cars, etc.


Andy: That sounds good. I wouldn't mind having our leaves raked.

Conversation

Kevin: What are you doing?

Me: I'm dusting.

Kevin: What's dusting?

Me: I'm wiping the dust off of these things with this rag.

Kevin: Where does dust come from?

Me: It's mostly dead skin cells with a little bit of dirt and a little bit of volcanic ash in it.

Kevin: Oh. Where did these crayons come from?

Celebrity Sighting

Dave Shields, author of The Race, a novel about the Tour de France (which we all know that I love), wrote a comment on this here blog.

Number Seven

Congratulations, Lance. You're a heck of an athlete.

Photos

At the Independence Day Parade in Catonsville, MD. He seemed to enjoy it and it was fun to watch him wave to the people passing by.

Kevin asked for a camera because I'm always taking pictures of him so I bought him a cheap disposable one and I love the things that make him think of taking pictures (tree service guys working next door, Papa working in the garden, etc.)

Chillin' in Grandma & Grandpa's yard.

Processing a new pastor

Our church's Founding Pastor is stepping down from the role of Senior Pastor so we've been in search of a new senior pastor. This is weird as there has never been another senior pastor except for Brian in all of our church's history (he and his wife and some friends founded it, after all.) But, I think it's time and I'm all for that decision.

Most of you know that I have had issues with our church and its leadership for awhile and some specific situations regarding Brian. This means that I have a very strong opinion regarding who should be the next "head" of our church.

This weekend, the man who our Senior Pastor Search Team recommended to our Leadership Team as our next Senior Pastor came with his wife to visit our church and our area. Granted, a few days will not be enough to really get a feel for what's going on on either side of the situation, but that's why God is in control of this and we'll all just do what we can with what time and other resources we have.

So I heard this man speak this morning during our church service and we also attended the Q&A/Meet 'n Greet afterward. That went on for awhile but it was worth it in my opinion.

All along I've thought that the new senior pastor's theology is the least of my concerns and that lots of other issues ranked higher up in my list of what's important. I want someone who will help get things done, who cares about each member of the congregation, who cares about the next person who walks through the church's doors, who is available to the congregation, who has leadership abilities and can pull teams together and encourage them, etc.

I was surprised to find while listening to the candidate that his theology comforted me. He was really on-track with my theology, which I wasn't even sure of myself. It's not that he said anything new or earth-shattering or different from Brian, but it was nice to hear it from someone who is not in the thick of trying to bring that message to the world at-large as the appointed spokesperson for the emerging church. I'm not saying that Brian's role as such isn't important, but it's not what I need right now and I'm a little tired of it. So, to hear this guy just "be" that kind of person with that kind of theology and be passionate about it was refreshing.

From what little I know, I really like the candidate. I think he's a good guy and will get the job of senior pastor done well and he seems to mesh with our church's personality. My biggest (maybe only) concern is that their family will need to move here from England. They lived in Cincinnati for awhile and he pastored a church there but from what I can tell from others who have come to our area to work in our church, the Baltimore-Washington metro corridor is not like most other parts of the country. Good or bad, it is what it is - fast, driven, I don't know what. A senior pastor isn't something that we ultimately want to gain and lose and gain and lose a few times in the near future. It would be nice to have one for awhile. This is a big deal. So I'm afraid of his family not fitting in or liking living in our area after making such a huge life change to be here. Of course, nobody is going to know whether they will like it or not until they've been here awhile, so we just have to let God make the final decision, eh?

Next weekend the church congregation will vote on whether to accept or reject the candidate as our senior pastor and then he and his family will be able to accept or reject the offer.

I think I'd really like for him to be our new senior pastor although I'm afraid to voice that out loud.

If only I'd read this sooner

Here's an article that I should've read when it was published on July 2, 2005. If I had read it then instead of now that the Tour's mountain stages are over and we know who the winner will be barring any serious misfortune, you can be sure that my blog would've screamed "Le Tour!" far more than it did over the past 2 weeks. So, friends, I'm sorry that I let you down. You may not realize it, but I've contributed to your loss of excitement over this amazing sports spectacle called Le Tour de France.

I leave you with this morsel from the aforelinked article by Dave Shields:

CNN has invited me to do a series of interviews on their network as this year’s race unfolds. I’m also doing lots of segments with other media, radio in particular. In tiny sound-bites I’m expected to convey the essence of this misunderstood and complex sport. The surprising thing is, it’s the easiest job in the world. Nearly everything about cycling is more interesting than casual observers assume. Yesterday I spoke with the hosts of a sports talk station in Nashville. I told them facts about how this event works, and listened to their stunned reactions. Once they got a taste of this forbidden fruit they attempted to dislocate their jaws in order to take in a bigger mouthful. Our interview went twice as long as initially scheduled. I’ve seen it over and over again. It’s a mystery to me how so many sports fans in America have been able to remain unaware of this event for so long.

Should I add this to my resume?

Today I sent in my application to be a New Balance Wear Tester. If I'm accepted I won't get free shoes or clothes or any financial compensation. I will merely get the satisfaction of knowing that my opinion really counts.

You see, I've fought with my feet and various other parts of me related to my foot problems all my life. As a kid, I could never wear my new shoes home from the shoe store because I had to wait for the stinky glue to dry inside where the pedorthist put in arch supports for me. I competed in gymnastics and spent countless hours in the gym pounding away on my feet and jarring everything good out of my joints. Today I'm mostly dealing with plantar fasciitis which has been extremely painful for the past 6 months or so.

Since high school I've worn orthotic inserts in my shoes which have helped my foot, ankle, knee, calf, hip and back pain tremendously, although I still have some problems even with the orthotics. Add to the space taken up in my shoes by the orthotics the fact that I have wide feet (EE on a typical Brannock measuring system) and narrow heels and you can imagine how hard it is for me to find shoes that actually fit - and cost less than $150.00.

Along comes New Balance with their high-volume manufacturing output of varying width shoes and - voila! - I'm a happy (albeit poor) camper. I'll take good shoes that fit for a price because, hey, I've tried the cheap shoe suffering route and it's so not worth it.

I feel like I'm a good candidate to test NB's shoes because I am active and play sports regularly, I'm heavy (particularly for a woman), and my feet are weird. The guidelines for testers state that testers should be as detailed as possible in their test reports and questionnaires. I figured I'd start with my application just to prove how detailed I can be. I told them all sorts of details about the history of my foot problems and how much I'd love to be on their team to help them develop truly superior shoes.

I'm supposed to hear in 4-8 weeks whether I've been selected or not. Even if I am selected, I may never receive a pair of shoes to test, but at least the option is there. I would really love to do this.

I'm not being fair

Really, it's not fair that my last post was about George Hincapie giving me a birthday present when, in fact, he didn't. And when, in fact, my husband and other family members and friends did!

Andy and Kevin gave me a hand-made card and a computer for my road bike. I have a computer on my road bike but no matter how fast I go, I can't get it to register over 1.7 miles an hour. I swear I've gone faster than that, at least on the downhills. The problem is that we had to move some of the wiring to hook up the trailer and it's not made to be used the way we (ok, Andy) tried to rig it. So now I have a new cyclocomputer with both a spoke-mount and a hub-mount magnet so we can use whichever works and fits best.

My family gave me all sorts of fun things including a new CD-ROM drive for Kevin's computer (so he can stop playing Big Bird and Jumpstart on mine and I can use it for my important work [read: blog-reading] again), a long-distance phone card (a hint? no, I actually asked for that), gift cards, a Rob Thomas CD, and some other things. And yesterday afternoon 2 of my best friends stopped by with an Oreo ice cream pie. Yum!! And thanks to everyone who sent me birthday cards online and in the mail.

By the way, I'm now 33 years old. It's not as bad as I thought it would be. Thirty-two was actually tough and I expected 33 would be, but it's not. That's good. I don't want to get anymore worry lines on my forehead ;-)

Big George!

Today is my birthday and I got an international present from people who don't even know me. I got to read that George Hincapie won today's stage in the Tour de France! Wow, George! Here are some quotes from http://www.letour.fr that help explain why George so deserved the chance to cross the line first:

George Hincapie has become the first team-mate of Lance Armstrong to win a stage of the Tour since 1999.

[George] has been a member of Armstrong’s team for each victorious campaign.

Since the beginning of the Armstrong Era none of his team-mates have ever won a stage (with the exception of the team time trial, of course). Today Hincapie is in prime position to change that fact. The American is the only rider to have been with Armstrong for each of the Texan’s winning campaigns.

He rules! Thanks for the birthday present, George. And also to the Discovery Channel team as nobody does anything without the team director's (Johan Bruyneel) and team captain's (Lance Armstrong) approval.

Would just one post matter?

I want soooooo bad to write about the people I work with. But I shan't, because I know better and have learned better from others who have gone before me. No, I'm not linking to any well-known sites of people who have been fired from their jobs for what they've written in their person blogs because most of them are potty-mouths and if you don't already know about their sites, then I'm not going to be the one to point you toward them.

But I really do want to write about the people I work with.

It's a coca-cola afternoon

I don't drink much soda. When I do (usually at parties), it's caffeine-free as I am not very tolerant of caffeine and sometimes it gives me migraines. Today, however, I just popped open a can of Coke. I'm falling asleep at my desk* and that is a bad idea for someone who would benefit from retaining her current employment.

If I sip it slowly (which is hard for me to do which is a reason why I don't drink much in the way of alcoholic beverages) I should gain the alerting effects of the caffeine without getting jittery and without getting a migraine.

Here's to a more productive afternoon starting in about a half hour. Cheers.

* This is a true statement, it is not an oxymoron**.


** Funny line from Renaissance Man - "Hey, you can't call me no 'ox moron.'"

Update - Wow, that makes no sense. I meant to say hyperbole, not oxymoron. Yikes.

5 months of growth and change

January 2005 -> June 2005

New Photos

Kevin on the kitchen counter

The remnants of Quiet Play Time. Note that the biggest mess is underneath him - a large pile of blocks, cards, cars and action figures.

How many child safety violations can you count in this photo?

A few hours to myself

Andy is driving his dad to Dulles airport and he took Kevin with him. Kevin will play with Abuelita & Tia Christy and Andy will pick him back up on his way home. This gives me a few hours at home by myself. Hallelujah!

Order of events:

• Watch TV and eat ice cream


• Fall asleep watching TV


• Wake up to phone ringing (this wasn't part of the plan but it happened)


• Slight re-organization of crafting area/desk


• Catch up on day's Tour de France coverage


• Listen to Jason's Lyric soundtrack


• Write blog entry


• Plan next scrapbook: ours and Kevin's journey to becoming a family ending with our trip to Guatemala


• Put some puzzle pieces together (State Birds and Flowers jigsaw puzzle laid out on dining room table yesterday.)

The Office

Early this spring, I caught The Office on NBC and I laughed out loud. I was able to watch a couple of episodes before it was removed from the airwaves. I don't know whether it'll be back or not, but I sure enjoyed it and would like to see more.

That show is based on BBC's The Office. I've borrowed a season of the show on DVD from a friend and I've watched 3 episodes so far. I know that a couple of friends will want to flog me when I say that I enjoyed the US version better, but there it is - I enjoyed the US version better.

The BBC version is too raunchy for my tastes and there were jokes that I'm sure I missed because of not being able to hear or understand what they were saying. I also like the main actor in the US version better - he just seems more genuine but clueless than the British guy and I "get" the jokes on there better.

For what it's worth, that's my opinion.

Nine Month Anniversary

Last weekend was our 9-month anniversary of meeting Kevin and becoming a family of three. Looking at pictures of him from back then really show how much he is growing and developing - he looks more like a boy than a toddler.

Some changes in the past 9 months:

He sleeps through most nights, he knows how to work the computer mouse, he plays imagination games, he knows how to pick only the ripe raspberries and he talks to Dora on the TV.

Some unchanges in the past 9 months:

He doesn't like not wearing shoes, he wants to be held a lot, he's cautious and he loves to play with balls.

Watch the trains go by

Today in the Tour de France is the Team Time Trial. It's like an individual time trial (against the clock and not directly other riders) but with a team (duh.) The team gets the time of the 5th rider across the finish line. I'm so excited!

A buzzkill, in effect

It never fails. I plan everything - "Kevin, you may take 2 and only 2 books"; "Find a small toy to take along"; "Do you need a drink of water?" Then I set off on our bike adventure and 2 minutes into my warm-up or just over the crest of a fast downhill or just as I downshift to cruise my way up a slope, I hear it.

"Please open my fruit snacks, Mama." "I need water, Mama." "I dropped my Cheerios, Mama."

Every once in awhile, Andy channels an extrovert

I am married to an extreme introvert. When he took career inventories in school, one of his top career suggestions was always "long-distance truck driver" and I do think he'd excel at that job. I wouldn't excel in the role of wife of a long-distance truck driver so I'm glad he never followed up on that, but he would do very well not to have to interact with other people but in between long stretches of just him and the road.

On the last night of our honeymoon when we walked a few blocks from our hotel in Anchorage, Alaska (yes, we are really cool for going to Alaska on our honeymoon) to eat dinner at the restaurant where we'd eaten breakfast our first morning in AK, another couple from the hotel went inside when we did and they started some small talk with us. The next moment may not have really happened but here's what I remember: Andy asked the other people if they wanted to get a table with us! They said yes and we ate dinner with them. "Who are you and what have you done with my (newly-minted) husband?" I asked.

When we go to places like the mall or the zoo, he gets really cranky because of the other people there. You can imagine my surprise last week when he suggested going to dinner on Saturday night a few hundred yards from where a local town was going to shoot off fireworks for Independence Day. He thought we could go early to eat dinner and then find a place in the throng of revelers to watch the sky show. "Who are you and what have you done with my husband?" I asked again.

He keeps telling me he's himself but I'm not convinced.

It's only just begun

Two opening "newsflashes" from a couple of websites I frequent during the Tour, particularly because I don't have cable TV and I have to "watch" the Tour on the Web.

From http://www.letour.fr:

15:12 - Welcome To The Live Coverage Of The 92nd Tour de France!

The 2005 Tour de France is scheduled to begin at 3.40pm with a 19km time trial from Fromentine to Noirmoutier en L’Ile.

Riders will depart at one-minute intervals.

The final rider to begin the first stage will be the defending champion, Lance Armstrong. The American Discovery Channel rider’s start time is 6.48pm.

From http://www.bicycling.com:

Against the Clock and Down by the Sea
Good morning and welcome to Bicycling.com's minute-by-minute coverage of the 2005 Tour de France. Today's opening 19km stage from Fromentine to Noirmoutier-en-Ile is against the clock, but it is not short enough to be considered a bona fide "prologue". Suitably, it is French rider Ludovic Turpin who has the honor of opening the festivities. The little climber from AG2R rolls off the start ramp in the seaside town of Fromentine at 3:40. Skies are overcast the temperature is 78F and the wind is off the ocean, out of the south west at 6mph; it is expected to pick up as the day go on which could favor the earlier riders in today's test.
3:24 pm

Whose legs are you wearing?

Yesterday I did a road ride with Kevin in the trailer in the morning and then in the afternoon a group of us went mountain biking (first time in a few years - suh-weeeet!). On Saturday mornings, Kevin and I usually go for a bike ride while Papa sleeps in a little but this morning I told Kevin, "We can't ride this morning because I don't have the legs for it today." Kevin pointed at my legs and said, "These your legs?"

I then rephrased my explanation.

All riders clear!

From www.tdfblog.com:

With less than 48 hours until racing begins, Tour de France organizers announced that all 189 riders from all 21 teams in this year's Tour were green-lighted after 2-hour medical and doping tests.

What will $730 buy?

• brake shoes


• brake drums


• master cylinders


• brake fluid flush & refill


• lots of labor

Andy knew what he was doing saying "yes" to replacing the belt but "no" to checking out why the brakes were squealing. He's a smart guy.

Le Tour Delicieux

My favorite Tour de France reading is Le Tour Delicieux by Crazy Jane. While she writes mostly for a more feminine crowd (she chooses a posterboy every day of the race and uses the nickname "hotpants" on numerous occasions) her writing style is so funny and so clearly knowledgeable of the exciting world of professional cycling that I often make Andy read her posts. You should, too. Read her posts, that is - not make Andy read them (I already do that, as stated.)

The New Heroes

On Tuesday night, Andy and I watched The New Heroes on PBS. It's about "social entrepreneurs" who "identify and solve social problems on a large scale." I only saw one episode. Andy watched two and there are 2 more on next Tuesday (at least on our station.)

At Worship in the Spirit of Justice last Sunday, one of the speakers from the International Justice Mission spoke about the power of personal stories. The day was aimed at the press so the speaker's point was that hearing about the millions of people enslaved around the world today doesn't affect much emotion, passion or call to action in our hearts but hearing the story of a particular slave and what their life is like and/or how they were saved from slavery is powerful. This is what was so great about the PBS show.

The episode I watched told the stories of Kailash Satyarthi, who rescues slaves in India and helps them gain a new life; Mimi Silbert, who provides work and life training to substance abusers, former felons and other "marginal" citizens; Moses Zulu, who helps orphans in Africa by providing them homes, schooling and training; and Dr. Govindappa Venkataswamy & David Green who provide free and low-cost cataract surgery to the people in India.

The stories were so inspiring. I wanted to call up each person and ask if I would work for them for free. It made me feel like one person matters and one person can make a difference.

I wondered about the title of the series, "The New Heroes" - is it really a new idea that people like that are heroes or maybe we just find it more socially acceptable now to not live solely for the almighty dollar?

You can go to http://www.pbs.org/opb/thenewheroes/about/schedule.html to find out when your local PBS station is airing the series. I encourage you to watch whichever episodes you can.

It's what all the good mothers are doing these days

Today I carried Kevin out of the shoe store with a new pair of shoes for myself under the other arm while he was screaming, "I NEED new shoes! I NEED new shoes!"

Conversation

Scene: Meeting at work

Me: I don't know what I'm doing with the plone site but I got a new document up there and I even made it visible so you all could see it before the meeting. So what's the difference between visible and published?

Manager: Publishing it makes it visible to all users. Visible makes it visible to site admins. That's why [other employee] couldn't access it.

Me (to [other employee]): Oops, sorry! That was my fault, I don't know what I'm doing.

Manager: Although he had never logged in so I had to set up his account. And when I set up all of the developers, I made everyone site admins.

Me (to [other employee]): So that wasn't my fault - I clearly know what I'm doing!

Conversation

Scene: Meeting at work

Me: So should I write separate documentation for adding a comment to multiple issues?

Manager: Isn't that what I just said?

Me: Sorry, I was writing down the first thing you said and I stopped listening to the rest.

Manager: *cracking up laughing* I thought only men had selective hearing!

Other men in room: Huh?

4 more days!

Jan Ullrich has been Lance Armstrong's biggest rival in the past Tours de France. Ullrich came in second place in his first Tour de France and then he won the following year. After that, Lance returned from his fight with cancer and made history. Jan has been working to win ever since but this year, he is gunning harder than ever. From VeloNews:

"I'd love to beat him," Ullrich, 31, told Welt am Sonntag newspaper. "He's dominated the race for the last six years and broken the records of the century. That's my motivation -- this is the last chance."

I believe that Lance will win. I believe that Ullrich will give a spectacular fight. I believe that others will ride their hardest and come close to the top but I don't think they'll get there this year. I think this will be a really exciting race and I hope that Lance's last race catapults American interest in cycling through the roof rather than forcing a drop-off when he retires.

It all starts this Saturday, July 2nd, in Fromentine, France. Will you be watching?

You know the honeymoon is over when....

...you ask with no judgment or a bad attitude whether your husband telling you that your truck needs a new belt is his way of saying, "If you go buy it, I'll put it on like I did when we were dating and you didn't even ask me to" or whether he means "You need to take your truck in for service."

Frizz Factor

I think the National Weather Service should just call me up each morning to find out the current humidity reading. Or just attach a humidistat to my hair and read it remotely.

Corners turned

• Kevin wants to sleep when he's tired - ok, so this isn't true all the time, but it's true some of the time and that's a big change. Today I took him, sleeping, out of his carseat and when I brought him in the house I took longer than usual to put my bags down and one of them knocked him. He woke up and said, "I want nap in Kevin's room." I eventually got him in there and he went back to sleep. He used to fight tooth-and-nail not to sleep, anytime.


• Papa is now only usually better than Mama, not always better - Kevin was superbly clingy with Andy for a long time but he eventually eased up on both of us. He'd still pick Andy over me to do just about anything. Now he is getting closer to 50/50 between us.


• Kevin is gaining selectivity with food and will leave food on his plate - although food pickiness can be really annoying, it's a good thing in Kevin's case because it means that his overt need for security from food is diminishing. Also, he'll leave food on his plate when he's full if I tell him that I'll save what's on his plate for another time.


• He'll stay in a separate room - if I leave the room that Kevin is in and he's in the middle of something, I can go without him following if I don't tell him that I'm leaving, even if he watches me leave. A week or two ago, he played a game on the computer while I took a shower, never coming into the bathroom while I was in there. Yowza.

Worship in the Spirit of Justice

After church today, Kevin and I went to Freedom Plaza in Washington, DC, to participate in this week's Worship in the Spirit of Justice aimed at increasing awareness, hope and help for the people of the Darfur region of Sudan. This effort is mainly spearheaded by our church (or at least some leaders and members of our church), Cedar Ridge Community Church, and Sojourners.

It was Kevin's first time in Washington and his first time on the Metro. He had a great time. The train was lots of fun, especially when the doorbell sounded as a warning that the doors were closing and Kevin would copy it quite loudly, "Ding dong!"

I couldn't really see the service as a service so much as an adventure with Kevin and trying to keep him safe and occupied but I did come away with something. While sitting with the group and listening to the speakers and reading the signs, I put myself in the shoes of the people walking by and checking us out. Had I not been part of the goings-on, I would've thought, "What a bunch of crazies - they're out here just to make it look like they're so committed to their idealistic cause. They should go do something productive instead."

Being a part of it and feeling like we were making at least a bit of a difference (not necessarily my participation but the participation of those who are actually doing more for the cause) made me realize that other peoples' causes and idealistic dreams should seem as important to me as my own. Yes, that should be obvious and yes, I can easily say, "Of course it should be that way!" But in my heart (and in my judgmental mind) that's not what happens.

It almost always takes me seeing somebody else's situation through their eyes (or my situation through somebody else's eyes) to feel that other peoples' thoughts and feelings are valid. This goes for small, everyday things as well. That's a pretty sad way to live, isn't it?

It ain't pretty, but it's a blogroll

My blogroll is back. In some ways it's nicer than it was (includes both fed and non-fed sites in one) and in others it isn't (looks weird with the rest of the template and I have to add links to my reader and my site.) But there you have it - a blogroll.

I'm hoping that I turned my site feed on and off appropriately while making changes to keep from sending every post as "new" but if I messed up, I apologize to anyone who reads this with an aggregator.

New look

I have a long list of things that I'd like to do today and changing my blog around isn't one of them. Alas, I put up the post about this morning's ride and my (very old) template didn't respond properly. I thought I'd just pick a new, similar one and be done with it rather than trying to figure out what went wrong. I forgot how many customizations I put in so I've spent way too long trying to get this new one to work the way the old one did (when it worked properly.) I think it's all set except for my blogroll which I probably use more than other people do so I don't think it's much of a loss at this point! I'll get back to that another time.

I was passed by a.... jogger

Getting passed by a jogger isn't a big deal if you're walking or even if you're jogging. But this morning, I was passed by a jogger while riding my bike.

Fortunately, I could use the excuse that I was taking a rest on a long slow-down to a stop sign. As we crossed the intersection, I called out, "Well, I sure hope I can speed up enough to pass you back!" He laughed and as I did pass him, I said, "You're the first runner to ever pass me... thanks!"

Once in a mountain bike duathlon (2.5 mile cross-country run, 10 mile mountain bike, 2.5 mile cross-country run) I was on the last run and the race director's pick up truck came up behind me. He was sitting on the tailgate and hopping out every so often to pick up the course cones. He joked around with me for a few minutes and then said, "You remember the route from the first run, right?" "Yup" I answered. "Well, then, I'm going to finish picking these up. See you at the finish." The awards had been handed out and by the time I was done, half the racers had already gone home. I was ok with that and able to laugh at myself because you know what? I FINISHED.

So to all those joggers who have yet to pass me and all of those cyclists who have yet to get annoyed on the singletrack when I can't find a place to move over and let you pass and to all those race directors who have yet to pull up cones in front of me or push me up a hill on my bike (yes, the same director did that to me once, too, and it was pretty funny) - have fun with it and remember that although I'm not one of you, I actually kinda am.

Read on the Web

"Our software is backed by award winning product documentation. The Society for Technical Communication (STC) recognized [Such and Such Company] for our 'ease of use, clarify, and overall professionalism of its documentation.'"

Don't you hate it when your spell-checker only picks up on non-words instead of checking against the words you intended to spell even if the mistakes spell other real words?

Did you know?

"The Alphabet Song" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune.

Le Tour, LIVE, LOUD & LARGE

I have some big news. Let's all take a deep breath. In... Out...

Are you sitting down? I am. Here it is - this year, same as last year, the Tyler Hamilton Foundation is offering the Tour de France LIVE, LOUD and LARGE (ie: on a movie theater screen with hundreds of other screaming race fans.)

Better yet, this year there is a showing in COLUMBIA, MD. Last year, I got us lost driving to the Ballston Commons (VA) location and we got there late (all the bagels were eaten and almost every seat was taken.) I can't get lost going to Columbia, right?

My family is having our annual July-birthdays celebration the same day as the big-screen showing so I'll have to see if I can work that out. Also, there's a kid to consider now. Who wants to spend the night at our house on July 15th and stay with Kevin the next morning? :-)

Le Tour! Le Tour! Le Tour!

It's been awhile since I mentioned the Tour de France and for that, I apologize. As one of the pastors at our church said on Sunday, "Hope is about what is going to happen, not what we're realizing or have realized." I'm sure he was talking about the hope that causes such excitement leading up to Le Tour, no?

Seriously, no offense to God or Jimi, as Jimi's message was really good and I know he was talking about God and not about Le Tour. But it's not as if God doesn't like Le Tour too, am I right?

So here's the deal - we're 11 days away from Stage 1 on Saturday, July 2, 2005. This year's race starts in Le Barre de Monts-Fromentine. Lance Armstrong is generally the favorite (according to the highly-scientific poll I conducted by reading one news article about this year's race forecast) and Jan Ullrich still seems to be the most likely to overthrow him. Ullrich does seem to be in better shape now than he was the past few years at this time so maybe he can do it this time. If not, I do feel for the guy - always the bridesmaid, never the bride - except when Lance is out of the race fighting cancer and the effects of chemotherapy. Anyway, other riders have been mentioned as possible contenders but most riders have stated in some interviews I've read that they are hoping for a place on the podium but not expecting first place to be held by anyone other than the Texan. Of course, I'm not saying that it's all locked up - I'm sure nobody is saying that while knowing that bad weather, crashes, bonks, illness, etc. are all part of Le Tour and can take a top or bottom contender out in an instant.

I'm not a huge Lance fan in general but I am seriously awed by his determination and commitment to using the talents he's been given to be the best at what he does best. As a person, I wouldn't be friends with him - he's much too intense. I had a knot in my stomach reading the first of his autobiographies because his personality reached out of the pages and grabbed my throat. But hey, he's an incredible athlete - and while he is a cancer survivor, I'm not sure "survivor" says it strongly enough.

I'd love to see Lance win again so I will be rooting for him. But I'll also be rooting for a good race with few crashes and wouldn't it be fun to see another underdog clenching his teeth and using every gram of glycogen in his muscles to make a name for himself like Tommy Voeckler did last year? That was too much fun.

Feel the Burn

I play in a Coed-BB volleyball league on Sundays at The Volleyball House in Elkridge, MD. This is our first season there - we were previously in a C-level league through the City of Laurel. It turns out that in the VB House leagues, when teams don't have enough players, they recruit players from wherever they can get them. In our match, we were asked if any of us wanted to stay to play the next game with another team. My boss and I checked in with our spouses and were given the green light (thanks, Andy!!) and, as luck would have it, the team we were playing with had a double-header. Yikes! Three matches in a row! Halfway through the first match with the other team, I asked during a timeout, "What... league... is... this?!" while gasping to catch my breath at 1) all of the running around I was doing as well as 2) the amazing feats of blocking and spiking I'd witnessed so far. We were playing on a team in the BBB league. I know, it's only one level up on paper, but it was quite a bit better than we play. It was soooo much FUN! I played much better than I usually do. Part of that was not feeling personally responsible for the team losing because of my mistakes (yes, it would be my fault for making mistakes, but it was their fault for recruiting me from a BB team) and the other part was due to the higher level of play by the other members of the team. We each played to our strengths and didn't have to play to our weaknesses and it worked! It was a great confidence builder for me and did I say yet how much FUN it was?

I'm still sore and taking ibuprofen but it was worth it.

Let there be light - the summer solstice

Today is the Summer Solstice, the day with the longest period of sunlight in the northern hemisphere. Here's a fun quiz related to the solstice. When looking for more information at the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration's website, I found interesting facts about the red tide (more correctly known as Harmful Algal Bloom, or HAB) currently in New England. I had no idea it was happening now and so that was interesting to find out as well as further information on such events. [There is a reason why my favorite word is serendipitous.] Check out the home page of the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution's section on HABs, particularly the image at the top with the label "Test your taxonomic skills." What fun!

Update: I forgot to mention my coolest bit about the solstice. Four years ago, Andy and I were on our honeymoon in Alaska for the summer solstice. We basked in 19 hours of daylight (would have been more if we'd been farther north but we were in Anchorage, Prince William Sound and Denali National Park.) It was really cool.

Happy Father's Day

It's too much to say more than "Happy Father's Day" to all of you fathers out there, so that's all you're getting. But know that it's from my heart :-)

Below is the transcript of an interview I had with Kevin last week which Andy will receive a copy of tomorrow for Father's Day.

Is Papa tall or short? "Short"

What color are Papa's eyes? "Black"

What color is Papa's hair? "Black"

What does Papa like to eat? "Orange Juice, Milk"

What does Papa love to eat? "Watermelon"

What is Papa's favorite color? "I don't remember, ok?"

What does Papa do at work? "Driving"

What do you like to do with Papa? "Playing, run around, kick Papa

What does Papa do to make you laugh? "Yeah (big grin)"

What does Papa do that is funny? "Yeah (big grin)"

How old is Papa? "3"

Does Papa love Kevin? "Yes, Papa loves Kevin"

Does Kevin love Papa? "Yes"

Conversation

Location: the office

Date/Time: thursday, june 16, 1:30 pm

Scene: Coworker walking in front of me in the hall carrying a folded up throw rug

Me: Hey, redecorating your office? *wink, wink*

Coworker (looking down at rug in hand): Don't you know?

Me (eyes and smile widening at the prospect of digging the latest intraoffice gossip): No, what?

Coworker: I'm Muslim.

Me (pausing, as I surely do know that he's Muslim, but not seeing any relevance to the current conversation): ...

Coworker (noticing the long pause and blank stare coming from my end of the conversation): We pray on rugs.

Me: I knew that.

I'd like to write an ode but, well, I just can't

I've been meaning to post photos of my truck since I starting reminiscing about it earlier in the year but I just got around to it. So there they finally are.

Last week, the odometer rolled over 160,000 miles and the little pepper is still going strong *sniff*, much to Andy's dismay.

I keep thinking of penning "An Ode To My Chevy S-10 Pickup" but I don't have the creativity for that. If anyone else wants to give it a try, let me know and I'll give you some material to work with. It'll be like those wedding songs that you can pay to have written when you give the songwriter some fun stories from your history. Although I'm not going to marry my truck - that's illegal in every state, isn't it? I mean, how would they do the blood test?

Brand spankin' new truck (2)

Spring 1994, when my truck was brand new. 

Brand spankin' new truck (1)

Spring 1994 - Isn't this the coolest truck you've ever seen? It was the first vehicle I owned. I was a senior in college when I bought it. I wanted to name it but couldn't decide whether to make it masculine or feminine (either way was a bit odd) so my roommate came up with the name "Al," short for Alex, Alejandro, Alexandra, etc., so that it could be either or both. 

Four Years of Wedded Bliss

As of today, Andy and I have been married 4 years. A few months after we got married, my brother's very perky Martha Stewartesque neighbor asked us, "So, isn't marriage great? For a year and a half after we got married, it was like we were in heaven. That feels good, doesn't it?" In my mind I answered, "I wouldn't really know how that feels, but thanks for asking."

Marriage and parenting - you can prepare all you want (and you should) but you never, ever know what you're getting into until you've gotten into it.

I wouldn't trade being married to Andy for anything, though! We've known each other for 9 years and although the first years were lots of exciting fun (first camping trip, lots of mountain biking, getting my truck repaired without asking, etc.) since we've been married, we've shared lots more. As we always say, "Go Team!"

Delilah, is that you?

I've now had, at least twice, a dream that I cut my hair off but - oops! - forgot to put it into a ponytail so I couldn't donate it to Locks of Love. What on earth is the point of this dream? Why am I concerned about something that won't happen? I will go to the same highly-competent salon that I went to last time to donate my hair and there is no reason to be concerned that it'll be scattered all over the floor, wasted.

Any ideas of the cause of my unconscious psychosis?

Kevin's first campout

Over the weekend, our church had its annual campout on the church property. Andy went by himself on Friday night to enjoy some time alone and then Kevin and I joined him on Saturday afternoon. Kevin did great - he walked most of the time instead of whining to be carried constantly and he slept all night. He had a meltdown shortly before we left on Sunday but I think that was ultimately caused by hunger.

The Mother-Daughter Mind-Meld

A couple of weeks ago, my parents came to visit and I showed my mom my new Timex sports watch. She showed me hers. They're exactly the same but a different color. We had both tried on a different color which was the same which neither of us bought. "I got mine at Target, where did you get yours?" "Target."

Last week I was thinking out of the blue about one of my favorite kinds of cookies that I haven't eaten in ages. On Saturday, my parents came over for lunch and what did my mom bring for dessert? Those delectable oatmeal, peanut butter and chocolate cookies that I'd thought of earlier in the week.

Scary or really, really cool?

Jingle Bear jingled all night long

We have a teddy bear that we affectionately call "Jingle Bear" because he plays the song "Jingle Bells" when his hand is squeezed. He was a thoughtful gift from my wonderful Secret Santa two Christmases ago and he has become one of Kevin's favorite stuffed animals.

Last night we had a really strong thunderstorm that lasted for quite awhile (and knocked out power all over the place.) While only one really loud clap of thunder woke Kevin, Jingle Bear was roused from his sleep on numerous occasions. I went in to check on Kevin and Jingle Bear was singing away! The thunder was vibrating the house and
apparently Jingle Bear's now-hair-trigger singing button was activated over and over. The poor bear had to be removed to sleep in the guest room for the night.

Nadal did it!

I know this is late but Rafael Nadal won the French Open! I was able to watch most of the last 2 sets (of 4) and it was a great match. It looked at times as though Puerta was going to take it away but Nadal's incredible run-downs to the ball kept him alive and kicking. He not only ran down a lot of balls that most people wouldn't have attempted, he ran them down and hit them back with authority - rarely did he provide a defensive lob to his opponent. Incredible.

Nadal is in the Finals!

I do feel bad for Roger Federer, losing his chance to add the French Open to his list of Grand Slam Championships, but boy wasn't it exciting to see Rafael Nadal win the semi? Nadal goes to the finals against unseeded Mariana Puerta who played two 5-set matches to get to his first-ever Grand Slam finals. Wow... 2 guys who've never been in a Grand Slam final? How fun will that be no matter who wins?! I expect I'll be rooting for Nadal, of course. I do hope they both play their best tennis ever - for their sakes as well as for those of us watching :-)

The French Open at Roland Garros

Equal Opportunity Sporting News - it's not just about Le Tour even though it may appear that way in July.

This week's excitement comes in the form of tennis played on the red clay courts of Roland Garros in Paris, France. Friday will be an adrenaline-fest as Roger Federer meets Rafael Nadal in one of the men's semi-final matches. Do I even know who's playing in the other semi? Nope. It's all about Federer and Nadal. I watched them play a heck of a match in Miami a few weeks ago (on TV) and I expect that Friday's match will be lots of fun. Federer is a seasoned veteran while Nadal and is ready to take over. Federer has won all three other Grand Slams (Australian Open, Wimbledon, US Open) but he's not won the French Open. Nadal is a clay-courter through and through so this is his court, so to speak. Will Nadal come out on top this time and upset Federer's apple cart?

Oooh, the suspense is killing me. Let's hope that they show some coverage on TV - and not just on cable, please!!