We all know that I will be really sad when we get rid of my truck. It was the first vehicle I owned. I've had it since my senior year of college so we've been through a lot together. I wasn't expecting the same sort of reaction to getting rid of an old, dusty textbook, but it happened.
Last night I received an email message from Half.com saying that one of my old textbooks that I listed a few weeks ago had sold. I was seriously excited as I hadn't expected any of them to sell. They're from 1990-1994 and most of them were used at the time and the versions are quite out of date. I bounced around and told Andy about it and then I looked to see which book it was - Discrete Mathematics! I felt a pang of something inside - something that made me want to refund the buyer's money and keep the book all to myself. But why? I hated that class! I squeaked by with a C (squeaked because a C or better was required as it was within my major) only because the whole class did so poorly that we all got bumped up a few tens of points so that good ol' Professor Kanal wouldn't have to give us all F's.
So anyway, I wondered what made me feel anything about this book? Maybe it was the penciled note inside the back cover that said, "Are you almost done? I'm going to turn mine in now - I'll wait for you outside" which I probably wrote to my first boyfriend, who I met in that class, during an open-book exam. Maybe I just miss the feeling of complete cluelessness that first semester of college after being so smart and scholarly in high school. No, I doubt I miss that.
Whatever it was, it caught me off-guard and I am so ashamed of it that I had to post it here for all the world to see. I mean, if I can't embarass myself in front of you all, then what's the point of having a blog anyway?
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